This weekend, my "baby" will be leaving home for two nights, on what I believe is an essential part of growing up, and experiencing life. Beansey is off to his first ever cub camp.
You would think that the happy childhood memories I have of camp, would be enough for me to push him out of the door, but no, I am petrified!
We had a camp meeting last week, where we were told on no uncertain terms, that the mobiles are ONLY for emergencies and that any text messages that said "is my little Jonny ok?" every 2 hours would be ignored. EEEKKK.
I tentatively asked "what time is bedtime?" and was told "when they are tired, usually about 10pm"
Of course my little cherub and all his buddies squealed with delight, especially when told they were allowed a midnight feast and always had a walk in the woods by torch light along with archery, an "olympic" afternoon and lots and lots of homemade cake!!
So, what is my problem?
I was getting his stuff ready today and my overactive imagination went into overdrive. I played a million scenarios through my mind and have hundreds of "what if" questions. This is what I imagined:
"What if he sleeps by the door of the tent and a murderer/weirdo opens the tent and snatches him?"
"What if he chokes on a cadburys mini egg that I have packed for his midnight feast and the others don't know what to do?"
"What if he walks off in the woods and gets lost?"
"What if the coach they are travelling to Essex in is involved in a car crash on the M25?"
"What if he misses me and cries and cries?" (as if!)
"What if he falls in a river and drowns (I don't even think there is a river nearby!)"
I could go on, but I think you get the drift of my paranoia.
Now, it is not as if he hasn't stayed away from home before - he regularly stays at my parents who adore the kids just as much as us and their safety and wellbeing are paramount. I know my parents love the kids as much as us, a cub leader, well of course they want all the kids to be happy/well looked after/secure but they don't love LOVE the kids the way that a parent does.
So, although I know he will have an amazing time and I truly believe that he is learning "life skills", I am having to deal with a feeling of loss/paranoia.
I'm trying not to project this and HAW thinks I am being utterly ridiculous BUT I still can't help but think no-one loves my babies as much as I do and would care for them as well as me!
So, am I being utterly ridiculous? Have you felt the same? How did you deal with it??
Peace and Love